One of the greatest deterrents to your realizing your full potential is the inner critical voice. The voice that is ever certain that the aim you’re trying to achieve is impossible! No matter what aspect of your life your attempting to change it will invariably recite a litany of reasons as to why your endeavor will fail. This reasoning may even appear to have some validity. To the rational mind the data may in fact be indisputable because it is factored on historical evidence! For instance perhaps what your wanting to do has never been done. [every great contribution to human kind was at one point condemned and ridiculed] Or perhaps prior to this moment you were never ready to be responsible for your own genius or conscious awakening. Maybe you were told that you couldn’t support yourself as an artist and your challenging that Self limiting belief.
Whenever you decide not to be a mere bystander of your own life you are bound to encounter the voice of the inner critic. This critic is an aspect of the ego. The ego fears change. Change equates to a loss of control and fuels a sense of instability and uncertainty. The ego is intolerant of anything that may compromise its sovereign rule. So the ego very skillfully plays upon your fears, insecurities, and feelings of inadequacy. It manipulates you into compliancy by fostering anxiety, depression and even self destructive behavior. The critical voice is intended to dissuade you from pursuing the very initiatives that will foster awareness and spiritual growth. It abhors risk of any kind! The ego does not want to be eclipsed by the directives of the soul. It does not want to lose command and will use every tactic at its disposal to weaken and undermine your relationship to your true Self. To truth itself. It will doing everything within its power to convince you that you are ill qualified to make independent choices in regard to your own life. It will provide one example after another of your failed attempts to fulfill your dreams and aspirations. In truth it is merely trying to protect you from the very learning experiences that will awaken and liberate you. From the process of Self realization. Know that the critical voice in and of itself has absolutely no power! The only power it has ever had is the power you have given it. That power is truth. Whatever you believe to be true has power! The critic isn’t the voice of truth, it is the voice of fear. And it’s source is the ego. In the Wizard of Oz, Oz rules as a result of presenting himself as a fearsome and unapproachable ruler. His subjects believe that he is omnipotent, omniscient, and omnipresent, in essence God like. They wouldn’t think of defying his rule out of fear of the consequences. Yet Dorothy and her entourage in their complete innocence discover that Oz is indeed just a scared old man hiding behind a curtain. He himself is lost and far from home.[ from his true nature] His fear led him to create a persona of greatness and power, an illusion to belie the truth of his mere mortal status. Oz represents the “ego self” masquerading as the Divine, the all powerful! Once you awaken to the truth the ego can no longer pretend to be something that its not. Its reign is over. This is the beginning of liberation. So how do you begin to depose the charlatan and silence the inner critic? Let me ask you this. What do you do when a child is frightened? Do you try to comfort and reassure them? As the adult do you take the appropriate measures to assure their safety and well being? When the critic surfaces approach it as you would a child who feels lost and afraid. Be gentle and compassionate. Listen to its concerns. Nothing is ever one by force, don’t attempt to challenge or dispute its claims. You can very skillfully take the helm without confrontation or conflict. By listening without judgement or quarrel you assume the position of authority it once held. Reassure it that it’s natural to feel lost and uncertain in times of transition. By observing it without prejudice or attachment you will lessen its ability to influence you. If you consistently refuse to give credence to this negative commentary it will eventually become ineffectual that is, it will have completely lost its power to manipulate and control your thoughts and behavior. Your true Self is awaiting the moment when you awaken. When you surrender to the unknown. This very moment free yourself from the tirade of the ego, from the illusion of its control. Connect to the aspect of yourself that is fearless. This is your true nature. It is spontaneous and responsive to the ever changing phenomenon that is Life. It revels in the joy, beauty and grace inherent in what Is. Take the helm, dare to live the life you’ve imagined! santidevi
0 Comments
Attachment breeds suffering. When you approach life from a state of attachment or expectation you will always experience disappointment, pain and suffering. Attachment creates contraction and contraction limits your ability to connect with the Source. When you’re not connected to the Source of your Being you feel anxious, fearful, depressed and overwhelmed. The more you try to manipulate, control and possess your life the more obstacles you encounter. Freedom lies in nonresistance. When you relate to life without attachment and without expectation you respond to life in a truly creative and genuine way. You are more efficient, and your actions becomes an effortless expression of your innate nature.
You become attached by virtue of desire. Desire breeds attachment. By dissolving your desires you will eliminate your attachments. This will ultimately lead to true freedom. Fulfillment of worldly desire is merely a temporary joy only serving to deepen your insatiability. When you’re no longer attached you spontaneously experience the essence of life, its Truth and intrinsic beauty. Nothing can be really known or truly loved without non-attachment. Do not mistake non-attachment with being detached. It is an altogether different condition. Detachment is a life limiting and self defensive response that results from not wanting to engage, or connect. It disables your perceptual and associative abilities. Whereas, non-attachment actually serves to expand your awareness and deepen your relationship to life. santidevi Where will you find God? Where will you experience the Divine? Where will you make your pilgrimage? Which holy site will bring you peace and liberation?
All that you seek lies within. The great Indian mystic and yogi Vivekananda said, “Knowing God is the aim and goal of all human life.” To know ones Self is to know God. Only Self realization will bring an end to suffering. Only truth of your essential nature will bring liberation. Where do you begin? Where you are. There must first be the desire. You must have the desire to know who you are. Then you must be unfailingly devoted to realizing your essential nature. It requires dedication and discipline. The discipline to stay the course even when it disappears beneath your feet, when the fear becomes a tempest and the collapse of the ego heralds your demise. It requires nothing less then a resolve that cannot be deterred or defeated, a fearlessness born of faith. In other words you must become a warrior. Single focused, noble in your cause and noble in your action. Your quest will lead you to a humbling realm, a place where you will experience the inexplicable greatness of your being. All your self importance will dissolve instantaneously. The illusional separation will cease and you will know the truth. All is One, One is All. santidevi The difference between fiction and truth is that fiction makes sense. Truth is never what you expect it to be. It is not conceptually derived.
One of my teachers wisely cautioned me not to judge where the truth comes from. Anyone can awaken you. The teacher can appear at anytime in any guise. Most likely in a form that transcends ones bias. My teachers have appeared as children, beggars, the homeless and the mentally ill. I have found beauty and truth in places of great poverty and despair. I have found grace in suffering. In every experience I have discovered liberation. Thus I have come to know that truth is ever present. It is inherent in human nature and experience. Truth can arise in the heart of ignorance. Thus it is irrepressible, omnipotent and omnipresent. Even when knowledge dawns the longing for Truth remains. Everything is a means to realization. Abiding in this truth all experience has value, every moment enlightenment. At the height of human suffering it is Truth that liberates us. Allowing us to see and experience life as it Is without judgement, expectation or attachment. In this way we return to our natural state of being. Pure consciousness. Truth is simple and pure, uncomplicated and real, illuminating and subtle. When the mind surrenders truth becomes self evident. With eyes to see and ears to hear the truth is revealed in the heart of the receptive. Contemplate: What is truth? How do I know when something is true? Who can deliver the truth? What is my relationship to truth? What value does it have in my life? santidevi At any moment you can shift your state of being. At any moment you can let go and be free and feel joy and come alive
The thing you can do is to be present. If you are being present you are missing nothing. When your mind is distracted by worry, there is an absence…the absence is you. Worry is simply a symptom of not being fully present, because when you are fully present all of that worry ceases. In part because when you are present, anything and everything you need is accessible to you. Your creativity is accessible to you. Only the relaxed mind can be a creative mind, a peaceful mind. So use the worry as an opportunity to awaken you to the moment. Worry is just an indicator of your absence, your distraction. Further, it is an absorption in the maya, in illusion. Because if we really look at it, worry is an emotion – an energy. Energy is mutable. so at any moment you can wake up, be aware of that energy and transmute it. How do you transmute it? By observing it. When we observe anything it is transformed. That’s all the effort it takes, the observing. Observe it without judgement, without analyzing, without commentary and the worry will transform itself. What is the opposite of worry? It is to be at peace, which is your natural state of being. Your natural state is to be calm, to be at ease. Worry is the by-product of a restless mind. Relax the mind and the worry ceases. This is the truth. Your body already knows this. This is why already you feel calm. You know intuitively that you have the ability to do this..the ability to discern the truth. So allow the transient to be transient. Don’t allow it to be solid. Don’t give energy to phenomenon that rises and dissolves. When you give it energy, you give it solidity and validity. This comes as a result of your wanting to manipulate your experience, to control your experience. Worry is a habit that arises from the ego wanting to control your experience…to change it. Worry, anxiety, depression, all that these things do is distract you from the present moment. They deplete your energy. This disconnects you from the source, from your true Self. This inhibits you from responding skillfully and authentically. Because from that place you are only reactive, not responsive. At any moment you can shift your state of being. At any moment you can completely let go of that worry and be free and feel joy and come alive. santidevi May I ask you a question? I’ve noticed the visuals I’m getting are becoming more frequent and meaningful…are we in a big transition period and do you have any suggestions as to what I can do to understand more clearly where we are headed?
Knowing I’ll hear from you soon… Blessings Mia Mia, Yes we are in an evolutionary transition. The best way to prepare is to cultivate “moment to moment” awareness. To “be where you are.” The mind is always trying to escape the present by “thinking” its way out. The more you cultivate “mindfulness”, or the ability to be present the more the mind will return to its natural state of being which is peace. In regard to your visionary experiences simply observe them without judgement, attachment, commentary or analyzation. Simply watch them as they are manifestations of the mind, or maya [illusion] which is transitory phenomenon. Therefore do not give them undue significance or lend them power. You are awakening to deeper levels of awareness and perception. The visions you are experiencing are an indication of this. Abide where you are in the stillness and silence within. By doing so you will begin to discern the real from the unreal. love, santidevi Shri Shivarudra Balayogi enters the Buddha room at Samadhi Yoga Center. He is clad in a bright pink dhoti. He performs aarti for his beloved Guru Shri Shivabalayogi Maharaj. This vedic ritual honors the Divine, the highest love of God. The silver platter is moved in a circular motion. The candles burn brightly as songs of praise and devotion fill the air.
Babaji moves effortlessly into a seated position on his dias. His eyes are closed. His face serene. He exudes the stillness of a mind that has returned to its natural state of peace. He is simple, humble without pretense. Being in his presence awakens and inspires Truth. The body relaxes, the breath deepens and the mind becomes receptive. He speaks slowly. His awareness is completely internalized. He initiates us into his Guru’s form of meditation. It is a simple sadhana that requires nothing more then bringing awareness to ajna chakra, observing whatever arises with complete vairagya or detachment. He reminds us that whatever thoughts arise are cleansed and purified. Babaji’s darshan fills our hearts. “Remember God.” I bow before this great yogi this Self realized being who travels half way around the world to bring his Guru’s teachings to our hungering souls. He fulfills his dharma through his service and we are nourished and healed. He listens attentively to our queries and responds with patience and love. He advises us to rectify our faults. To remove all negativity from our minds. We share prasad. He receives individuals after the formal satsang and meditation for private consult. I attend to folding the chairs with Rekha and disassembling the room. We work together seamlessly and by the time we are done Babaji sits alone. I give him a wild pink rose and bow. He gives me his blessing to fulfill my mission. To inspire and awaken the truth to those who seek to know the true Self. Our eyes meet and there is the transmission of Divine Love. I feel his quiet mind within my own. His radiant heart my heart. I pray to my beloved in gratitude for the grace that has filled my being. santidevi I lie in bed. I listen to the sound of waves crashing melodically from my industrial metal night stand. They are produced from a machine designed to bring the natural world into a room without windows. The primordial Buddha sits motionless. His beloved consort gazes up at him in ecstatic bliss. Entwined they are but One. No illusions.
It is late and I am listening to my breath. It is soft and deep. I am breathing. Here in the Silence the continent of my body dissolves. I am naked. We are all naked. Unidentifiable. Even my samskaras take their leave. My eyes are closed. I am absorbed into the vastness void of conception. “There is no birth or death”. The truth arises naturally out of the emptiness. My consciousness is not here or there. It is not fixed. I am without border. Form ceases. My mind is mindless. I am aware that I am Awake and yet I sleep. “I am asleep and yet I am Awake.” My consciousness is not bound to my body. I see myself the mortal woman lying so still and warm hardly breathing. She has surrendered. I feel love for her vulnerability, for the fearlessness it gave birth to. I love you I whisper. Sleep my love, sleep. santidevi Thoughts create your emotional experience. Whatever you think produces a physiological as well as an emotional response. Thought creates form. Whatever you think you become. Thoughts and emotions are not powerful in and of themselves but become so when you invest them with identification. You cannot have a single thought or emotion that does not effect your entire being.
Emotions are the energetic impression of your thoughts. You are not your emotions. Emotions are a transient phenomenon that arises as a byproduct of your thinking process. There is a direct correlation between their duration and your willingness to empower them. By identifying yourself with your emotional condition you authorize and surrender your authority and self control. This is why extreme emotional responses lead to feelings of helpless and paralysis. Whatever you identify with you become energetically bound to. Experiment with this by observing how your state of mind effects your emotional experience. Begin by thinking of something that is sorrowful or distressing. Allow yourself to completely identify with what your thinking. What arises in the body, how do you respond emotionally? What happens to the breath, to your heart rate? Just notice with your “witnessing consciousness.” Now let it go. Now think of something that is joyful or pleasing. Once again focus all of your awareness and intention on that thought. What sensations emerge, how does your body feel? How has the breath changed? Be aware of the direct relationship of the mind and the emotions. By simply observing your thoughts without attachment you can reside in the spaciousness of equanimity. The next time you find yourself in an emotional state bring your awareness to the condition and become the “observer.” Watch with detachment and non-judgement. Stay connected to your breath and stay absolutely present to the experience. This practice will allow you to begin to discern the real from the unreal. The transient from the eternal. Om, Santi Devi What does it mean to surrender?
Surrender requires humility, humility requires surrender. When we stop resisting and judging what “is” we begin to experience the divine intelligence inherent in the phenomenal world. This same intelligence reveals itself within our own nature. Contrary to what one might theorize this revelation does not inspire arrogance or self importance but true humility. For there is an immediate transcendental awareness that this power does not originate from the individual “I”. It eclipses it. I invite you to surrender. Santi Devi |
ArchivesCategories |